


Philautia

by The_Readers_Muse



Category: Bridgerton (TV)
Genre: Coming of Age, Drama & Romance, F/M, Intimacy, Masturbation, Unresolved Romantic Tension, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Vaginal Fingering
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-15
Updated: 2021-01-15
Packaged: 2021-03-13 05:02:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 541
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28772784
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Readers_Muse/pseuds/The_Readers_Muse
Summary: "At night? What happens at night?"
Relationships: Daphne Bridgerton/Simon Basset
Comments: 4
Kudos: 106





	Philautia

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own "Bridgerton" or any of the show's characters, wishful thinking aside.
> 
> Authors Note #1: I wanted to examine Daphne's thoughts during THAT scene in 1x03 and Daphne's thought process when she touches herself in bed that night after her and Simon's conversation.
> 
> Warnings: drama, romance, romantic tension, masturbation, coming of age, vaginal fingering, intimacy, unresolved sexual tension.

_"At night? What happens at night?"_

_"When you are alone."_

_"When I am sleeping?"_

_"Not when you are sleeping. When you touch yourself. You do touch yourself? …When you are alone, you can touch yourself…anywhere on your body, anywhere that gives you pleasure, but especially…between your legs. And when you find a feeling you particularly enjoy…you can carry on with that…until the feeling grows, and eventually you reach…a pinnacle, a release. And that should help you…come."_

* * *

There had long been an ache. A throbbing, maddening thing that twinged through her core when she was on the edge of sleep. Ceding to Morpheus' call. She knew it had not always been there. But as she grew older, she felt it more. That strange, particular ache.

Instinctively, she'd never mentioned it. Not to mama, not to her sisters, not to her governess, not even to the maids. Knowing, as she believed a lady ought to, that it wasn't something one brought up. Even in the most intimate of conversations.

But she _had_ wondered.

She wondered about many things. The nature of men. The riddle of how one came to be with child. How exactly a wife was expected to demure to her husband in the marriage bed. How she was supposed to equate propriety with the supposed 'shared pleasure' she'd heard the maids gossip about in the kitchens.

But she wondered about the ache the most.

And now, his boldness had given her permission. Permission to let her hand be drawn down to the seam of her intimates. Rubbing just so through her layers until - impatient and panting - she inched up her night dress and-

Yes.

_Oh yes._

Delight.

_Wicked delight._

That was what the feeling was.

A warm, shuddering, shivering, building sensation that curled her toes and vibrated tension through unfamiliar muscles. Knowing there was something more she was reaching for until the feeling became too much, and she retreated. Basking in the sparks of that lingering pleasure. Unfinished, but not unfulfilled.

_Was this what he did at night?_

She knew little of the masculine body, or it's workings.

But she knew it would be different.

_Was he perhaps in bed as well?_

_At this very moment?_

_Did he also touch himself this way?_

_How had he known to instruct her?_

She considered it all as the shadows danced across the blue velvet of her canopy bed. Remembering the bare of his arms when he'd rolled up his sleeves. The way she'd felt when his tongue had slicked down his spoon - chasing the sweetness of the dessert.

He seemed much educated on the matter.

She bit her lip, letting her fingers trace the line of her sex. Grazing light, peach-fuzz hairs. Shivering with it. From it.

 _He knew women._ Perhaps even how to please them.

She hummed a low sound in her throat, fingers grazing her belly.

She wasn't so naïve, she knew what young men were oft to do before they married.

She knew the company her brother, Anthony took when he was away from home - alone.

But now, now she was experiencing the concept in a new light.

_If he were to touch her, what then would that be like?_

A wicked delight, indeed.

**Author's Note:**

> Reference:
> 
> \- Philautia (self-love): having a "positive mental attitude" and engaging in self-care. The Greeks understood that, in order to care for others, we must first tend to ourselves. This is not a sense of vanity, but an awareness and acceptance of who you really are, showing yourself compassion in darker times.


End file.
